“Art is not a mirror held up to reality but a hammer with which to shape it.” — Bertolt Brecht
We like factions. I, personally, like the idea of categorizing. It releases me from having to make sense of anything at all. Although I like the “idea” of freedom and independence, I don’t think they’re required. Free will is a beautiful concept, but maybe not a choice.
Today is July 7th, and it’s hot outside. There’s a drought, actually. Or at least I saw that on social media. It’s still crazy that I can find out serious news from a repost of a friend of a friend on their story. I really want to speak into the void and see what answers back. I’m writing this now because I am trying to reach into the void. I’m tired of being afraid of being perceived.
I realize this is not a nuanced way of thinking in 2024, but I want to mean it. I want to write and share without caring about perceptions. It’s such an exhausting way to live. I don’t think I ever acclimated out of the middle school girl way of addressing confidence. I simply pretend to have it, and somehow, things happen.
I say that because I want to feel like writing and posting what I think, how I feel, things I enjoy, and things I don’t. I have so much old poetry from 2015 that I should never show anyone. I created a whole anonymous account to post. I couldn’t face myself even then.
I’m tired of reality. I think we should all embrace the strange. We use social media as our form of self-reflection, right? At least I do. And I know I don’t share things I write. I love to show things that I make with my hands. Or maybe things that I earned through sheer determination—an award, a blanket, pictures I’ve taken. And all of this to prove something. I’m working out, in real-time, what that something is.
How did people share art before computers? They created out in the open. They painted murals on entire ceilings. They stood in front of crowds and performed.
Being unapologetically public with your art, it seems, has always been the most organic way to share passions.
So here I am. Trying.